Count Down

Sorry it has been so long, I am not sure what to say or how I feel. We are done radiation! That is wonderful! Joshua is doing well and feelling better. I am trying to wean him off his meds and he wants to go to school part time. Now, on to the part I am reluctant about. On May 8th we go into the hospital for the first round of Chemo. I have been attending a support group and it has made me worried. Other parents talk about how the hospital stays can become longer than planned. The doctors say that the children tolerate the medicine well but these parents talk of symptoms that we have already seen and what a struggle they are. Also, I am holding my breath because he has an MRI that day and it is the first since he started treatment. Also his oncologist was not very sure how going to school work out. She says that there is "bounce back" that can occur in 4 to 6 weeks after the radiation is over and he may become fairly sick from it. Of course that occurs during the first cycle of chemo and who knows what that will do to treatment. I was excited about finishing treatment and this break that we have off but when I told the nurse see you in 4 weeks, she said " oh, I will see you sooner....I am sure". That is one of the hard parts about cancer, it never goes away. It dominates every decision and you can't ever seem to forget it, even for a little while.

That said, Josh is happy now. He is feeling better than he has in a while and making plans to go biking with the good weather we are having. We are inviting his friends over this Saturday for a play date and he is really excited about it. I am greatful that radiation is over and we can move forward. Hopefully I can use this break to get the other kids under control and make them feel better. Dorothy has been very angry that I am gone so much and it will be nice to spend time with her. We could really use some good news and a break right now so I am praying that this works out and that Josh can stay healthy for this short time. On my next post I will post the pictures I took on that last day of radiation. They have a ships bell and you can ring it when your treatment is over. I took pictures of all the children standing around Josh as he rang it and that was fun. One thing I am glad of is that even when I am worrried or scared to death, Josh does ok. I work hard to keep that from him and let him be care free and not worried about the future, that is my job not his. Keep praying if you can and we will work hard to have 4 fun weeks. Thanks for all you do.